When Does Dating Become 'Marriage-Like'? How BC Courts Decide Common-Law Status

Many couples in BC live together for years without marrying, and many more spend most nights at one home while keeping two addresses. At some point, one of them may ask whether the law now treats them as spouses.

The answer depends on whether the relationship was marriage-like, and for how long. That phrase is not defined in the statute, which is why it is so often argued in BC family law.

What the Family Law Act says

Section 3 of BC's Family Law Act treats a person as a spouse if they are married, or if they have lived with another person in a marriage-like relationship and either:

• Two years. They have done so for a continuous period of at least two years, or
• A child together. They have a child with the other person. This route does not apply to the Act's property division and pension division parts.

The Act also says the relationship begins on the earlier of the date the couple began living together in a marriage-like relationship and the date they married, and that a former spouse is still a spouse for the Act's purposes.

So there are two separate questions: was the relationship marriage-like, and if so, when did that start? Both are often disputed.

There is no checklist for "marriage-like"

The statute does not define the phrase. BC courts decide it case by case, looking at the relationship as a whole. In Weber v. Leclerc, 2015 BCCA 492, the BC Court of Appeal upheld a finding that a relationship was marriage-like and treated the couple's separate finances as one factor only, not a deciding one. Earlier, in Austin v. Goerz, 2007 BCCA 586, the court took a similar holistic approach and treated financial arrangements as relevant but not determinative.

The practical message: no single fact decides it. Keeping separate bank accounts, or never formally announcing that you are a couple, does not on its own mean the relationship was not marriage-like.

What courts tend to look at

Without turning it into a checklist, these are the kinds of questions that come up when status is contested:

• Living arrangements. Did you live together, and for how much of the time? Where were your belongings and your mail?
• The personal relationship. Was it an exclusive, committed romantic relationship?
• Daily life. Did you share meals, chores, holidays, and care for each other when ill?
• Money. Did you share expenses, own property together, or support one another, even if accounts stayed separate?
• How others saw you. Did family, friends and social media treat you as a couple? How did you describe each other on forms?
• Children. Did you raise children together, including a partner's children?
• Intention. What did each of you say and do about the future of the relationship?

What a person says about their intention is weighed against what they actually did. A statement that "we were just dating" carries less weight if the rest of the evidence points the other way.

When did the two years start, and when did they end?

Timing can matter as much as the label. Couples often move in gradually: a toothbrush, then most nights, then a lease in both names. The start date can decide whether the two-year threshold was met at all.

The end date matters too. Section 3 says spouses can be separated while still living in the same home, and a court may consider one spouse's communication of an intention to separate permanently, or an action showing that intention, as evidence of separation. That cuts both ways when someone argues that a relationship ended before it reached two years.

Same couple, different answers under different laws

The two-year rule in the Family Law Act is not the only definition, and the others differ:

• Estates. Under section 2 of the Wills, Estates and Succession Act, unmarried partners are spouses if they lived together in a marriage-like relationship for at least two years. There is no child-based route, and they stop being spouses when one or both end the relationship. Our article on dying without a will in BC explains what a surviving spouse inherits.
• Income tax. The Canada Revenue Agency treats someone as a common-law partner after 12 continuous months of living in a conjugal relationship, or sooner in some situations involving a child. You can be common-law for tax purposes before you are a spouse under BC family law.

If you have been filing tax returns as common-law partners, expect that to be raised as evidence if status is later disputed.

Why the answer matters

Whether you are a spouse decides whether whole parts of the Family Law Act apply to you:

• Property and debt. Spouses who have lived together in a marriage-like relationship for two years may share family property and family debt on separation. Our article on what separation means for unmarried couples' property covers what is shared, what is excluded, and the two-year deadline for making a claim after separation.
• Spousal support. Support can be claimed by a spouse, which includes a partner who has a child with the other person even if the two-year period was not reached.
• Estates. A surviving partner who meets the estate definition may inherit on an intestacy and may be able to challenge a will.

Protecting yourself while the relationship is going well

The simplest way to avoid a status fight later is to deal with it now. A cohabitation agreement lets you and your partner set out how property and support will be handled if you separate, whatever label a court might later apply. It also helps to keep records of when you moved in, what each of you contributed, and how you held property.

If you have already separated and status is in doubt, get advice quickly. The time limits for property and support claims can start running from the date of separation, and that date may itself be contested.

Not sure whether you are a spouse? Get a clear answer before you act

Our family lawyers can review the facts of your relationship, explain which laws treat you as a spouse, and help you protect your position, by agreement or in a dispute.

Call 604-259-2844 or send us a message to arrange a consultation at our Vancouver office.